Unless you are a home owner. Then it’s clean out the shed or the garage and going to Home Depot and Lowes to beat the crowd for the sale on fertilizer.
I don’t care how cheap it gets, I refuse to stand on line before the place opens to get the first bag of manuer. Mowing, trimming, pruning, rototilling, thatching. These words have replaced running, skipping and jumping in my weekend vocabulary.
But how can I complain? I am living the dream. Owning a home in the suburbs. The American dream. They didn’t tell us it was a nightmare. My wife is famous for ending every sentence “after this, we are done.” She lies. We are never done.
I can’t wait to sell this house and move to some over 55 community for “active” adults. That’s the new term for old age home. I will throw away my rakes and trimmer and snow shovels and buy a rocking chair. I will sit on my little 2 X 6 front porch alloted to me by the gated community facist regime and fall asleep in the sun. Probably wake up with a sunburn on half of my face but I won’t care. I will gladly wait on line for the sale on Calamine lotion.
Now that is MY American dream.
Daily Theme Song:
Dave Edmunds – Here Comes The Weekend http://youtu.be/CQKpyoztJn4