Modern Love

Most TV sitcoms are more “Must Miss”, than “Must See.” However, one in particular hits more than it misses. Modern Family. I know it wins awards and is rightfully recognized, but last night’s episode in particular really made me laugh.

One of the best characters is Ty Burrell’s, Phil Dunphy. Last night he introduced his Philosophy on life. I predict this book will be in print very soon. I was LOL’ing out loud (a Dunphyesque quote right there…no?)

excerpts below:

Complete list of advice on Phil Dunphy´s book Philsosophy

  • Always look people in the eye, even if they are blind. Just say “I´m looking you in the eye”.
  • If you get pulled over for speeding, tell the police officer your spouse has diarrhea.
  • You only get one chance at a first impression. I suggest Julia Child because it´s easy to do.
  • The most amazing things that can happen to a human being will happen to you if you just lower your expectations.
  • Dance until your feet hurt, sing until your lungs hurt, act until you´re William Hurt.
  • Take a lesson from parakeets: if you are feeling lonely just eat in front of a mirror.
  • Never be afraid to reach for the stars, because even if you fall, you´ll always be using a parent-chute.
  • Marry someone who looks sexy while disappointed.
  • Older black ladies make the best ice tea.
  • Success is one percent inspiration, ninety-eight perspiration and two percent attention to detail.
  • You can tell a lot about a person from his biography.
  • Watch a sunrise at least once a day.
  • If you love something, set it free, unless it´s a tiger.
  • If you are ever into a jam, a crayon scrunched upon under your nose makes a good pretend moustache.
  • When life gives you lemonade, make lemons. Life will be all “Whaaaat?”

Daily Theme Song:

David Bowie – Modern Love http://youtu.be/xJxOL_eFGEk

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About Stevie GB

57 year old stand up comedian from Long Island. My approach to comedy is telling the truth about being married, middle aged and living in the suburbs. I enjoy making people laugh without making them feel uncomfortable. My act is clean and clever. Featured in Newsday and on News12. Winner of the Huntington Arts Council Laff-off, 2006. 3rd place winner of LI Press Best of LI 2011, A regular on The Long Island Comedy Festival for 9 consecutive years. Opened for Dennis Miller, Louie Anderson, Kevin Pollak, Bobby Collins, Bob Nelson, Uncle Floyd, Kevin Meaney, and many more.
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2 Responses to Modern Love

  1. marlhtv says:

    LOL Loved these two.

    • You can tell a lot about a person from his biography.
    • If you love something, set it free, unless it´s a tiger.

  2. Love this show. And these philosophies are hilarious! Thanks for posting.

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