Stevie GB tweets

I have discovered that Twitter is really kind of a fun place to say funny things.

Some of them are a little time sensitive, but you can figure that out.

Follow me on twitter: Stevie G.B. ‏@Steviegeebee

Here are some of mine that got the most re-tweets and favorites..
There are more whistleblowers than actual whistles

Brookhaven Lab driving 15 ton magnet to Illinois to be put on 30 ton Refrigerator

Yay…Twinkies are back. I can’t wait to not buy them

2.1 Earthquake in New Jersey turned out to be Gov. Christie doing a Cannonball.

I’m at Dicks sporting Goods and some creepy guy is flirting with a young girl. Somehow this seems like the appropriate place for this…

#PaulaDeenTVShows The Smothered Brothers

Kanye named his daughter North because in 16 years that’s the direction her legs will be pointing….too soon?

I READ A BOOK ON THE TEN THINGS YOU SHOULD NEVER DO ON FACEBOOK. I DID NINE OF THEM. NOT I DO ALL TEN.

Celebrity Chef choked by her husband is charging him with assault…and pepper……too soon?

The Feds are raiding 7-11 stores on Long Island. Maybe they will finally find out what’s really in those breakfast sausages….

I have posted nothing today….well…almost

Wouldn’t it be awesome if Snickers really could make Robin Williams disappear

Somehow my phone settings were on Airplane Mode. Must have happened when I threw it

167 Models went to see The Purge thinking it was an instructional film

Tony Awards. We get to see Matilda, Annie and Cinderella…not the plays…the drag queens on the red carpet

Alcohol is banned on the LIRR this weekend for the Belmont Stakes and Puerto Rican Day Parade. Apparenly the LIRR is racist and horsist

I saw Man of Steel. Not one mention of Andrew Carnegie

Just got a voice mail from NSA to remind me to pick up milk.

NSA just “liked” my status

Nobody admits they eat McDonalds but the place is always packed

Happy hump day…porn stars just call it Wednesday

Pres. Obama was heckled at a press conference. The heckler was removed and taken to the nearest comedy club…

Got that Caffeine shake…it’s like the Harlem shake only it lasts longer

Follow me on twitter: Stevie G.B. ‏@Steviegeebee

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About Stevie GB

57 year old stand up comedian from Long Island. My approach to comedy is telling the truth about being married, middle aged and living in the suburbs. I enjoy making people laugh without making them feel uncomfortable. My act is clean and clever. Featured in Newsday and on News12. Winner of the Huntington Arts Council Laff-off, 2006. 3rd place winner of LI Press Best of LI 2011, A regular on The Long Island Comedy Festival for 9 consecutive years. Opened for Dennis Miller, Louie Anderson, Kevin Pollak, Bobby Collins, Bob Nelson, Uncle Floyd, Kevin Meaney, and many more.
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